Thursday, March 22, 2012

Strength I Didn't Know I Had

So, we broke up. And since then, I've been keeping myself extremely busy. It wasn't easy of course, but it was mutual. We're still talking. I'm not sure where the future will take us, but only God knows that, so I've come to some acceptance with just staying in the moment. Sometimes I don't realize how out of the moment I've gotten until some life on life's terms comes my way. But it was all set up perfectly. After we broke up, I hung out with my girls in the program, which has a way of feeling like a safety net. I also ate something called a "Stroganoff Burger" from this awesome restaurant and enjoyed the hell out of it! It was mouthwatering... So after I was done depending on my friends and food to distract myself from feeling, it was off to a meeting and then home on that long stretch of interstate all alone. At least that's what I thought... It's been a few months since I really felt God in my heart. I've still been praying, but to feel the comfort of my Higher Power is something completely different. And that night, I prayed and prayed and then I felt it. That warm sensation that everything was going to be alright and that no matter what I thought, God could always take care of my man better than I can. And he definitely can and will take care of me if I let him. I wasn't alone after all!So, my prayer life has been phenomenal this last week. I'm so grateful to have started the practice of it again. I want to get more in touch with it. I usually feel really connected when I'm going through something upsetting or when I'm really really happy, but what about those in between moments? How is my prayer then? It's not normally very fulfilling, because my heart isn't in it. But I want to work on that. I want my heart to be in it even in those everyday moments. How do you stay connected to your God? What type of prayer is the most fulfilling for you?

2 comments:

  1. I'm glad that you have finally prioritized yourself at the top of the list. Well done Sophie.

    Prayer is a very important and motivational force, and even if my type of prayer may be derived from other less religious practices than yours I know how very vital they are for forward progress. Keep your eyes on being rather than feeling too. Feelings are great and can be very motivational, but with regards relationship things, they can get very confused. Being means right here right now. no past no future only the joy of being present can give true satisfaction and meaning.

    Nice post, very open and honest.

    Big hugs, loads of love.

    P.W.

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  2. Thank you! It is so true what you said about feelings. They do get very confusing! :) The more practice I get at taking care of myself, the better I get at putting the feelings aside and just doing what needs to be done that moment.

    Thank you so much for your support!
    Big hugs and love back at you :)

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